We have all seen those couples out to dinner, staring into space or at their mobile phone screens, anywhere but into the face of their dining companion. These are the tired relationships, eating together out of habit with nothing much to say to each other. Dining out used to be a special occasion, but for these couples it is an agonising waste of time. Then, there are the lonely solo diners, accompanied by a book or tablet screen. The waiters put these sad individuals in corners and cul-de-sacs, facing away from the room full of happy diners.

More Than Muscles on the Menu: Delectable Dining Partners

There is an exciting alternative to these two, less than flattering, situations. The smart money can find a dining partner who excites more than their bottom line. A gorgeous, enthusiastic escort to share a tete-a-tete with; and where your focus will be firmly fixed upon their visage. Boredom will be cast out from your paradise, like a fallen angel. Lust will tempt appetites more than muscles on the menu with your delectable dining partner. Conversation will be animated, gleeful and teasingly suggestive. There will be no deathly silences and melancholy.

A professional companion can enliven not only your dinner, but your very life. They come prepared to enjoy the full four courses and after dinner surprises. Why eat the same thing every night of the week, when you can vary your dishes? Too many couples are caught up in property; and the lights have long gone out on their frisson for each other. Dining is a celebration and should only be pursued with suitable dining companions. Better to save your pennies for a big night out than waste them on ennui filled situations.

When you eat with more than food on your mind, I find that you eat less and enjoy it all the more. This could be called the Escort Diet – where diners direct their energies into more than gobbling calories. The game is afoot and the seduction is, although guaranteed, still to be played out. Anticipation fills your body with hormones and, yes, she will probably moan. Moistened lips with pink tongue tip lightly oiled with some dining grease. Eyes sparkling with dilated pupils drinking in the arousal of the moment. Dining should be like this and not an occasion for boredom with mister or missus dreary. Shake off the ennui and step out on the wild side for a change.